I Won't Give Up
by Taylorblue21
Summary: Set after Edward leaves in New Moon. Bella's health takes a deathly turn, and her chances of survival are slim. Will a familiar doctor in Alaska be able to save her life, or will she be left at the hands of fate?
1. Chapter 1

_Bella_

Life had started to take its toll on me. Its bad enough living without _him_, but I have also started to notice changes in my health.

My eating patterns have grown more seldom as time goes on. I felt more like I was supposed to eat, than I actually feeling the need for food.

I still cooked Charlie dinner each night, but as he ate I was usually in my room asleep. At first I blamed my fatigue on my period. But my period came and passed and my fatigue still lingered.

Everything was starting to become an endless pattern, each day ending the same as the one before. School, dinner, homework, shower, then sleep.

I convinced myself I was taking a "nap" in the afternoons, around 6 pm. But a nap was a hour or two of sleep; mine was twelve hours.

It exceeded the necessary eight hours, but that wasn't what scared me the most. The most terrifying part, was I was still tired after that unusual amount of sleep.

I even tried going to the doctor for it, they just assumed that it was depression because of the _Cullens_ absence. I gasped in pain at the thought of their names, it opened a door to my memories that I tried desperately to keep locked.

Memories of all the times I've spent with them flooded my mind. Rosalie's ever present glare sending shivers down my spine, Alice dragging me onto those terrible shopping sprees, Emmett's jokes at my clumsiness, Esme's compassionate heart always trying her best to make me feel at home, Jasper always keeping his distance since he was the most vulnerable to human blood, Carlisle stitching me back up after one of my many accidents, and Edward..his memories hurt the worst.

His crooked smile that I loved, his kisses that always took my breath away, his touch that sent shocks throughout my body, his golden eyes scrutinizing my face in a feeble attempt to figure out what I was thinking. My mind seemed to enjoy causing me physical pain as it replayed the day that Edward left me in the woods.

I grasped at my chest, desperately trying to keep the hole from tearing me apart. I screamed in agony from the physical pain these flashbacks caused me.

I could feel the room spinning, dots dancing across my vision, and unconsciousness finally seeped in and knocked my body to the floor.

When I finally woke up I wasn't on my bedroom floor. I was in Forks Hospital with Charlie pacing across the short room.

He was mumbling incoherent things, his face a mask of worry and fear.

"Dad?" I called. He stopped walking and looked over at me, relief flooded his features and he scrambled over towards the empty seat beside me.

"I'm so glad your awake. How are you feeling, honey?" Charlie questioned. He still had his police uniform on, which made me wonder how long I had been out.

"I'm fine. How long have I been asleep?" I questioned. He seemed reluctant to answer, fidgeting with his cell phone instead of looking me in the eye.

"A couple of days," he mumbled so softly I almost didn't hear him. I was shocked to say the least. Two _days_? Is that even possible?

Charlie took in my surprised expression and was about to say something comforting when a doctor entered the room.

He was average height with wavy brown hair that barely touched his forehead. He had brown eyes with a nice tan to go with his dark features.

"Hello Bella, my name is Dr. Carter. We have run some tests and have come up with a new diagnosis that contradicts your last one. Since you are eighteen it is not required for you to have your guardian with you, would you like him to stay or leave?" he asked. I like this man, he doesn't drone on and on like most doctors do. He just cuts straight to the chase.

"He can stay," I assured. I didn't want to keep anything from Charlie and he shot a grateful glance at me.

"Alright. Well there's no easy way to say it, but you have leukemia. The hospital here doesn't have the right treatment for your cancer and we have called another hospital, that was the closes we could find, who have the right equipment for this. It's Alaska and they said they'd be more than happy to treat you. I know it's a lot to take in, so I'm going to come back in a little while for your decision." Dr. Carter explained.

I numbly nodded towards him, or at least what I thought was his figure. It was impossible for my eyes to focus on anything after just learning this terrifying news.

I glanced over at my father and he was in the same state as I was. His posture was tense and rigid, his eyes glazed over, and I felt terrible for him.

I didn't care about what happened to me, I just didn't want Charlie to suffer along with me. My hand grasped his and gave it a gentle squeeze, he glanced at me with tears in his eyes.

Seeing him so fragile and vulnerable made my decision to leave Forks easier. I was all he had left and I don't know how he would take it if I were gone as well.

"I'm sorry, Bells. I should be the one comforting you." Charlie apologized. I shrugged it off, knowing that we both would need to rely on each other.

"It's fine, Dad. Can you go get Dr. Carter? I've made my decision." I requested. He nodded glumly and slowly got up from his seat, giving me a kiss on the forehead before exiting the room.

"_I'm thinking of Charlie, of course. He needs you. Take care of yourself— for him."_

I winced at the memory. But _he_ was right, Charlie needs me. I will take care of myself for Charlie.

**Poor Bella. Will she pull through this deadly cancer, or will it overpower her? What happens in Alaska? Reviewers get a sneak peak of the next chapter :) **


	2. Chapter 2

When I came home from the hospital everything was already to go for my departure. My bags were packed with my belongings and already stuffed into the bed of my truck.

Charlie and I had already said our goodbyes so I figured it would be easier if I left while he was at work.

There was a constant nagging feeling in my gut that I played off as forgetting something that I would need. I checked every room in the house, but the churning in my stomach just wouldn't go away.

I racked my brain for possible solutions to this unexplained emotion, but couldn't find any. So instead of dwelling on it, I pushed it to the back of my mind and got into my truck.

My camera was tossed carelessly into the passenger seat, but looking at it now put the pieces of the puzzle together.

There were two places in Forks that I had forbid myself to go to since _he _left. Our meadow and his home.

But now that I'm practically at death's doorstep, there's nothing keeping me from going to those places. If I were to die in Alaska, could I really live with knowing that I didn't even give myself a chance to say goodbye to _them_?

I put my truck in reverse and backed out of the driveway. This wasn't going to be easy and I mentally prepared myself for what was to come on the way there.

I allowed myself to remember. The touch of his cool lips against my own, the way his skin sparkled like a thousand diamonds in the sun, the spark of electricity that ran through my veins at his mere touch.

I could feel the numbness that I had struggled to maintain, start to diminish. I locked up the memories inside of my mind and figured that was enough for right now.

The mental preparation did no justice to help me in any way when my truck stopped in front of the Cullen's house.

Seeing the home itself didn't hurt as much as I expected. It was still the same elegant, white house that I had always admired.

The house didn't do much to faze me. The seven vampires awaiting on the front lawn, however, did.

My body started to shake, my eyes taking in each one of their beautiful, inhumane faces. _Your just dreaming, Bella. They aren't really here. _

I tried to believe that this was all just one dream and that in a few minutes I would wake up. But no matter how many times I pinched myself or shut my eyes tightly and then re-open them, they stayed in the same spots.

_Your no good for me, Bella. _

He was right, I wasn't good for him. He doesn't want me, he doesn't love me, so why in the world is he back?

And then everything popped into place. They must have heard that I was leaving Forks so they decided to come back. How considerate, huh?

This was just one big mistake, I should have never came here in the first place. My foot slammed on the gas and I sped out of there as fast as my truck would allow.

An inner battle was forming inside of my mind. I was angry at myself for not staying and actually finding out the real reason why they left.

But I was also relieved to be out of the vulnerable state that their presence put me in. Anger and relief are two emotions that don't usually coincide with each other.

This stress was starting to really take its toll on me. I wanted to curl over and fall asleep, but I knew that I needed to at least wait until I could find a hotel.

My eyes drooped downwards every now and again. _Just hold on a little longer, Bella. You promised nothing reckless._

That thought would always jolt me awake. Especially since it was not my voice. My mind would analyze the soft, velvety texture of his voice while I drove on in my desperate search for a hotel.

Even _his_ voice couldn't stop the exhaustion that always returned no matter how much I wished it wouldn't.

My grip on the wheel loosened and my eyes lost sight of the road. The voice roared angrily in my mind, but not even it could wake me up.

There was a loud horn honking that sounded so close that I almost thought it was mine. I looked up in time to see headlights shine in front of my eyes and then everything went black.

**Poor Bella just can't get a break. Are the Cullens really back, or is it just her imagination? Thank you so much for the reviews! Reviewers get a sneak peek. :)**


	3. Chapter 3

It was if I had sunk to the bottom of the ocean; all of my senses were dulled. Voices mumbled incoherent things from all sides around me, taunting me to wake up.

The pain was the second thing I noticed as I started to regain conscious. My head felt like someone had run it over with a steam roller, backed up, and repeated the process. There were slight shocks of pain all throughout my body, but none of them came close to what was going on with my head.

_What happened to me?_

It felt as if I was floating towards the top of the water, the more I floated the more pain I could feel. I started to concentrate on the voices who were now much easier to distinguish.

"How much longer, Alice?" a velvety voice asked irritatedly. The voice sounded like it belonged to an angel, so beautiful and soothing.

"A minute precisely. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if she was able to hear us now." she answered, obviously annoyed.

"Bella? Can you hear me, love?" the angel asked. Did he just call me _love_? Oh no. It wasn't all just a bad dream, the Cullens were actually back in Forks.

I could feel myself start to be able to control my body. To make sure that I was right, I focused all of my energy on my hand and I felt it twitch in response.

My body grew rigid when I realized that there was something grasping onto my hand. Curious as to what that was, I opened up my eyes.

I sighed in relief when I noticed that the room's lights were off, protecting me from the harmful brightness of the fluorescent bulb. My eyes wandered over to my right hand and noticed that someone's hand was holding it.

I looked up into the owner and was met with topaz eyes. I quickly looked away, blood rushing up to my cheeks.

"It's nice to see that you haven't changed. You still blush all the time," Emmett chuckled. I couldn't help but blush even deeper at be recognized of my embarrassment.

"What's the last thing you remember, Bella?" Carlisle asked. His doctor instincts took over and he was examining my injuries as he questioned me.

"Where am I?" I felt bad for ignoring him when he was trying to help me, but I needed answers.

"Your at our house." he answered, calmly. Oh no. Charlie must be worried sick, I was supposed to have called him when I reached Alaska. Which would have been last night if I hadn't of gotten in that stupid wreck.

"I need to leave. I'm not supposed to be in Washington," I tried sitting up but it felt like the pain in my head was weighing me down. However, I'm stubborn and a headache is not going to get in my way of where I need to be.

"I'm sorry, Bella, but you are in no condition to be going anywhere," Carlisle sympathized. The nerve of these people! They completely take themselves out of my life and now they all of a sudden _care_? I don't think so.

"You don't understand, none of you do. I have somewhere I need to be, it's a matter of life and death." I explained. Maybe I was being a little over-dramatic, but they released me from the hospital because I needed chemo immediately. I finally sat up all the way and released Edward's hand, which was the equivalent to having an arrow shot at my heart.

"You were just in a car wreck, I'm sure whatever it is can wait." Edward demanded. There was no way for me to escape unless I hit him where it hurts, and that's exactly what I plan on doing.

"Would you please stop acting like you care? You told me I wasn't good for you and that you didn't want me anymore. So what does it matter to you if I die? A guilty conscience? You'll live," I felt pretty proud of myself when I finished my speech. I didn't realize until now that I had so much resentment bottled up inside me from their absence. But it sure as heck felt good to get it off my chest.

After looking each of the Cullens in the eye and realized that they must not have been informed of what Edward said to me in the woods that day.

Their emotions ranged from anger to disbelief, and then settled on shocked. I didn't give them time to recover and quickly made my escape for the door. I felt so accomplished when I got outside that I almost didn't notice my truck was gone. Oops.

Oh well, I need to clear my head I'll just walk back to Charlie's house.

The idea sounded so brilliant in my head, but in reality? Not so much. My legs ached from the long walk and my head pounded from the car crash. How do I always get myself in these messes?

After what seemed like forever I found the site of where the whole ordeal happened. My truck looked like it was perfectly fine, not a scratch on it.

The other car wasn't as fortunate as mine. The red paint had flaked off of my vehicle and coated the hood of the Ford Explorer. The front end of the Ford wasn't very bad.

The hood was crushed and the bumper was in the woods, but other than that it looked like it was alright. The windshield was still intact so hopefully the injuries of the driver weren't too bad.

The driver side door was open so they must have been stable enough to have fled the scene. I opened the door to my truck and was grateful to see that the keys were still in the ignition and that my cell phone was in the cup holder.

I grabbed it and noticed that there were five missed calls, all from Charlie. I hopped into the cab of the truck and hastily called Charlie, deciding I was going to have to improvise for my whereabouts.

After only a couple of rings he picked up. Now, I would relay the conversation, but it would take a while since we were on the phone for a long time. So I'll just give the basics.

He pestered me for answers as to where I went, which I lied and said that I got a really bad headache and pulled over on the side of the road to sleep.

That wasn't the answer he was looking for since as soon as he found out that I was still in Forks he demanded that I return to his house. Which I was already doing, so I easily gave in to his demands.

He then started to give me safety lessons on how bad it was to sleep on the side of the road. Serial killers, wild animals, blah blah blah.

I barely payed any attention and mumbled an apology every now and again when he would pause through his speech. Before he could start up a whole new lecture about how I should have just called him in the first place, I assured Charlie that I was almost home.

We said our goodbyes and I was left in silence for the remainder of the ride home. My thoughts started to wander to what was going on in the Cullen household.

Why were they back? Why did they let me leave so easily? Many questions but no answers, and there wasn't any source for me to get information since they were out of my lives.

I almost regretted my decision to leave so hastily, but the longer I stayed the harder it would have been to leave.

Wait, what is _that_? I wondered as I stomped on the brake so I wouldn't hit whatever it was. After making sure the truck wasn't moving anymore, I looked at the creature in front of me.

I was sure that it was the Cullens and that they were trying to stop me from driving in my condition. To my surprise it wasn't them, but it was a vampire.

"Laurent?"

**Sorry for the updates that are taking so long. I'm working on two stories at once and it's a lot more difficult than I would of expected. But back to the story, looks like Bella has gotten herself in another sticky situation. Will he spare her life? Thank you for the reviews! Reviewers get a sneak peek into the next chapter :)**


	4. Chapter 4

_Laurent?_ My mind screamed. What does he want? He looked completely relaxed, his eyes were very dark. Indicating that he hadn't eaten in quite a while, which isn't a very good thing for a human like me. He strolled over to my window, making a gesture with his hand for me to open the door.

I complied with his suggestion, too shocked to make my own moves. My feet hit the asphalt and I shut the door so that I could lean on it. I looked expectantly at Laurent for answers.

"It has been a while since I saw you, Bella. How are you and the Cullens?" he questioned. I visibly winced, the flashbacks of seeing them in person played through my mind. I once again started to wonder their true motives for returning to Forks.

"Is something wrong?" Laurent asked. I forgot how fast vampires reflexes are and cringed when he placed a reassuring hand on my neck. Part of me was screaming to shrug off his hand and step back, but the masochistic part pictured that it was Edward's hand. Comforting me as always with his gentle caresses, his sweet scent..but this wasn't Edward. And the man I love no longer feels the same way, so he could care less about helping me.

"No, nothing's wrong. Everything is fine with them. Now, what do you need?" I asked. Laurent studied my face as if he didn't believe me. I don't know what he saw in my facial features, but it must of satisfied him because he continued on.

"Well I just wanted to warn that Victoria is back in town." he explained. I could see that there was more, but he didn't say anything. Most likely gauging my actions, but I just kept a straight face. I was tired of playing games, I need to get to Alaska.

"She has some very special plans for you, and they are not going to end with a happy ending. A slow, painful death is her intentions. Now we wouldn't want that would we?" This all seemed to crazy. Laurent had a run in with Victoria and now he is just going to let me off the hook with a warning? No, there's something else to this.

"Well, thank you for the warning. But I really need to be on my way. It was nice seeing you," I grabbed the handle on the door and heard it open with a creak. I was about to get in when Laurent shut the door, blocking my escape.

"I'm sorry. But this is serious. I don't want something so horrible to happen to you. It would be much quicker if I did it. Think about this, Bella. What would you rather have; a slow, painful death or a quick and painless one?" he compromised. I wish that I had run him over while I had the chance. But I'm sure the truck would be the one destroyed.

"How about, neither?" I said through gritted teeth. Adrenaline was pumping through my veins, urging me to get away from this ravenous vampire. I started to step backwards, knowing that I wouldn't be able to get in the truck before he shoved me out. I would make a pitiful attempt to run away, and hopefully he would find it amusing enough to let me run for a while until I found civilization.

"That just won't work," he chuckled. I could see his feet start to move towards me, and I turned in the opposite direction and started running. I ignored everything around me, only focusing on the need to get away from this vampire.

After a few minutes of constant running and panting, I knew that he was playing a game with me. I was the little mouse and he was the big, vicious cat. My body was already weak enough from the cancer, which meant that I was more out of shape than usual.

My legs felt as if I was running through water and my breathing was short and labored. I could hear the beating of my heart ringing through my ears and I knew that there was no way I could last. I stopped running and fell to my knees, gasping for air. My health was in a critical condition enough as it is, I don't need to make it worse.

I felt two strong arms wrap themselves around my waist and pull me into a standing position. I fought feebly against him, struggling to break free from his grasp. His hands only pulled me closer to him. My eyes stayed closed from the pain, if it weren't for Laurent I wouldn't be standing. I grabbed his fingers and tried to pry them off of my stomach, but they stayed interlocked with each other.

"Just kill me quickly, please." I begged. A growl came from deep in his chest, but it wasn't of hunger..it was anger. Why was he mad? I opened my eyes and looked down at his hands, but what I saw wasn't what I was expecting.

These hands weren't a smooth brown, they were white. I looked over my shoulder and into his golden eyes. Edward. What was he doing here? I was about to say something when he interrupted me.

"I could never kill you," his voice was pained. My hand rested on his in a comforting gesture, I couldn't see Edward driven with anguish. No matter what happens between us, I don't want him to be anything but happy.

"Where's Laurent?" I asked. The run was beginning to take it's toll on me and I could feel my eyes start to droop, but I forced them open.

"We took care of him. He won't be bothering you anymore." he answered through gritted teeth. His posture went rigid at the mention of my attacker, but I couldn't understand why it bothered him so much. Is it possible that he still has feelings for me?

"Can you let me go, please? I need to get back to Charlie, he's probably really worried. I was supposed to be back a long time ago." I explained. His grip on me loosened, but he didn't let me go completely. I stood on my own to show him that I was capable of walking without falling.

He let go of my waist but kept a hand by the small of my back. Edward wasn't touching me, but I could still feel warm energy spread throughout my spine at his close proximity. We turned around and started walking towards my truck.

My body was aching and I was ready to just sleep in the middle of the road, but I couldn't have his arms wrapped around me. Sure it made my heart flutter and warmth wash through me, but it just hurt to know that it was a one time thing. That I would never again get the privilege of being wrapped up in his embrace. Just thinking about it made the hole in my chest start to throb. My vision started to blur and I looked over at Edward, who stared at me with a worried expression on his face.

"Edward, please stop spinning," I begged. Everything around me was spinning so fast; it was like putting your head on a baseball bat and running around in circles repeatedly. I couldn't tell where the forest was, everything just looked green. And then I collapsed onto the ground. Before my head could make contact with the concrete I was pulled up into his arms bridal style.

The last thing I saw before everything went black was Edward's beautiful face.

**Poor Bella just can't get a break. What will happen when she wakes up? Please review! Reviewers get a sneak peek :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Edward's POV:**

"Why would you say something like that to her, Edward?" Alice yelled. Jasper had a firm arm wrapped around her mid-section, keeping her from attacking me. His eyes showed the anger and betrayal that everyone else felt but he restrained her since he knew that I wouldn't survive against Alice's vicious attack.

"She had to let me go. It was the only way," I pleaded for them to understand my intentions. They had been angry enough at me for making them lose someone who was a part of their lives, and now they knew I had lied to Bella. Convincing her of a lie that was so brutal that it made me hurt just thinking about it.

"Why are you so selfish, Edward? Your not the only one who's hurting. Did you see the look on Bella's face when she remembered what you had said to her? That's cruel! Maybe you don't deserve her," Alice spat. I ducked my head from her intense gaze, knowing that she was right. I never felt as though I had deserved Bella, but this just proved that I was right. She deserves a normal life, one without the supernatural interfering. A human husband that she can grow old with and have children; the thought made me grimace but I knew that someone had to be that person for her, and it wasn't me.

"You messed up, man. Now you need to fix it." Everyone stared at Emmett in shock, including me. He was always the one to joke around, seeing him serious didn't happen very often.

"How do you suppose I do that? She hates me." I grumbled. Emmett was about to reply when Alice went stiff and her eyes glazed over. I put all of my focus onto her thoughts so that I could clearly see her vision.

_Bella was standing in front of the driver's side door looking uncomfortable. Laurent was leaning casually against her truck, as if it was an action he had done often. _

"_You do look very appetizing right now. It's a shame that Victoria has to miss such a tasty meal," he whispered. He took a deep breath, inhaling her scent that produced a hungry glint in his charcoal eyes. Bella's eyes widened as she saw Laurent slowly approaching her, she was too shocked to even fathom the possibility of moving. _

_Her mouth opened to say something, but he didn't notice. She whispered the word "please" before his teeth penetrated the skin on her neck and started drinking hastily._

"No!" my mind screamed, everyone jumped a little in surprise so I guess I had voiced my anger as well.

I quickly ran out of the house and made my way towards the setting of Alice's vision, desperate to save Bella.

**Bella's POV *Present Time***

I groaned as I stretched my stiff muscles, a sigh escaped my lips and I was ready to drift back into sleep when I heard an angel call my name.

My eyes opened automatically and were met with a pair of black ones. I frowned, Edward obviously had been holding off a much needed hunting trip.

"Where am I?" I asked. I scanned our surroundings and found only trees and gray clouds, typical for Forks. The Cullens were in front of me, keeping enough distance so that I wouldn't be uncomfortable. I noticed that Edward has his arms wrapped around me and blushed, an automatic reaction to being in close proximity of him.

"Typical Bella," Emmett chuckled.

"How much do you remember?" Edward questioned, ignoring Emmett's comment. My eyebrows scrunched together as I struggled to remember what happened last night, my memories were hazy. Like trying to see through a water bottle filled with juice. You can make out shapes but not specific details.

"I was driving home, and then Laurent appeared in front of my car...I ran until I couldn't anymore..then I saw you..Oh my gosh, Charlie! He must be so worried," I exclaimed. I scrambled out of Edward's arms, immediately missing his comforting embrace, and searched my pockets for my phone.

"We already called him. He wasn't exactly happy to hear that we were back, but we assured him that you were fine. He expects you to be home soon," Carlisle assured. I glanced at him gratefully before searching for my truck; when my eyes landed on it I immediately started walking over to it. Edward appeared in front of my path, blocking me from opening up the door.

"You're in no condition to drive. I'll drive you home," Little did he know that he was making my condition worse by putting off my chemo sessions.

"I'll follow her home to make sure nothing bad happens. Besides, we need to start packing up for Alaska." Alice interfered. I knew it was none of my business where they were going, but I could help but let the curiosity get the best of me.

"Why did you come back to Forks?" I asked. They all looked taken aback by my boldness which made me feel guilty. I was about to apologize and assure them that it was none of my business when Esme spoke up for the first time.

"Carlisle has a patient coming in that needs special treatment. They are lacking some of the necessary tools to treat her so we came back here to retrieve them." she explained. I was getting chemo in Alaska, could this be just a coincidence? Only one way to find out.

"Who is it?" I asked.

"We don't know. It's confidential so the staff couldn't tell me who it was." Carlisle explained. I could feel the blood draining from my face, Charlie had asked the doctor not to tell anyone that I had leukemia. I didn't want to be treated any differently and I knew how gossip spread around in this small town. Could it be possible that I was Carlisle's patient?

"Um, I really need to go. I'm sorry for wasting your time." My words sounded all jumbled together since I was trying to get them out in a hurry, but I knew they understood. Alice looked like someone had just clipped a credit card in front of her face, but I assumed that it had nothing to do with me. I brushed passed Edward and hopped into my truck, turning the key that was resting in the ignition. The truck roared to life and I maneuvered onto the road, making sure that I didn't hit them.

I risked a glance back at them and found Edward's eyes looking intently into mine. My breath caught in my throat and I quickly tore my eyes from his, not wanting to get into another wreck.

The drive back home was quiet and slow. Knowing that my mind would wander to the Cullens if something didn't distract me, I turned on the radio.

_Starts With Goodbye_ by Carrie Underwood flowed from my speakers and swirled around my truck. I was tempted to change the station, but I knew that I couldn't take an upbeat melody.

I soon found myself humming along to the chorus and tapping my fingers on my steering wheel. I had no music talent in any way, shape, or form, but I always felt the need to move my fingers to the beat.

When I finally pulled into the driveway, the moment felt bittersweet. Of course I had missed Charlie and didn't want him to worry about me anymore, but I didn't want to face the interrogation that I was sure would arrive upon my entrance.

I walked into the house and found Charlie, Billy, and Jake sitting around the TV. Football was playing on the screen, junk food and empty beer cans scattered across the coffee table. Jake took a deep breath, obviously noticing my arrival.

He slowly got up from his position on the couch and walked over to me, he was about to say something when his face turned into an expression of disgust.

"Why do you smell like vampire," he growled low enough that only I could hear. _Here we go. _

**Hmm..I wonder what's going to happen with her and Jake. Once again, I apologize for the agonizingly long update waits. School has been taking out a great portion of my writing time. But anyways, thanks for the reviews! I love reading them :) Reviewers get sneak peeks into the next chapter :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note:**

**I am very sorry to inform you that I am putting this story on hold. There are some major family issues that are taking place that is preventing me from having a clear enough mind to update.**

**I know that it's not a good excuse, but it's the truth. I'm hoping to post another chapter around October 10th. Possibly before then, but I'm not sure. Thank you for baring with me, and I apologize for the inconvenience. **

**Taylorblue21**


	7. Chapter 7

**Bella's POV:**

"I don't have time for this right now, Jake" I whispered. He glared at me and gave me a you-better-tell-me-about-this-later-then look. I rolled my eyes and shoved past him, I hated being rude to Jake but I really just need to leave.

"Hey Dad," I mumbled. Charlie whirled around to face me. His eyes scrutinized my body, making sure that I had no injuries.

"Where have you been, young lady?" he asked. I could hear the strain in his voice, he never was that great at hiding his emotions.

"I just wanted to tie up some loose ends. I didn't know the Cullens were going to be there," I explained. I could see the confusion etch into his features, but he didn't question my motives.

"Well, I guess the good thing is that your safe." he said. The tension in the room was almost unbearable and I just wanted to leave.

"I don't want my truck breaking down on the way to Alaska. Do you mind taking me there?" I asked. There wasn't really any point in having me take my own vehicle since I'm going to be cooped up in the hospital until my appointment is over.

"Sure, kid. Sorry about the game boys, can we reschedule?" Charlie asked. Billy wheeled over to Jake, who was giving me a curious look, and nodded at Charlie.

"That's fine by me. What are you guys going to Alaska for? Ice fishing?" Jake joked. The last time I had attempted to fish I ended up in the water. When they pulled me out they said my line was stuck on a log underwater, but I didn't believe them. I always declared that it was a really big fish and that they were just jealous that I got it and they didn't.

"Coming from the guy who used to have a barbie fishing pole? I'm so offended," I retorted. His cheeks turned a bright red and he bowed his head.

"Touché. Seriously though, why are you going to Alaska?" Jake asked.

"Uh..to visit..um..family," I stammered. I felt bad for lying to Jake, but I didn't want anyone to worry about me. It's bad enough that the Cullens will soon find out about my illness.

"Oh okay, well y'all be safe now. Come on, Jake" We said our goodbyes and I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. Charlie picked my bags out of my truck and put them in his cruiser. For once, I was actually glad to be riding in his car.

Most of the ride was filled with a comfortable silence, but we made small talk every now and again. That's one of the things I love about Charlie, he doesn't feel he has to fill the silence with mindless chatter. Halfway into the drive I felt myself slipping into a peaceful slumber.

Trees surrounded me, there were no leaves on them due to winter. The grass was dead and had a nasty shade of brown replacing it's luscious color. The sun was low in the sky, and I was laying on the ground. A voice whispered my name and I tried to turn towards it, but I was unable to move. I focused on my arm, begging for it to move. It didn't. I started to panic and my breathing turned to short gasps. A dark figure manifested on top of me, pinning me to the ground. I looked into his cold stare, a hint of red forming around the edges of his black eyes. Laurent.

"Your dead," I whispered. Laurent chuckled, showing his pearly, white teeth. I struggled against him, but he didn't loosen his grip.

"You will be too, my dear. Do you actually believe that you can survive against this cancer?" he asked. I winced. Of course I didn't believe that I would live, I just hadn't fully accepted my fate. Laurent grabbed my weak body and pushed it against a nearby tree. His hand wrapped around my throat and his other hand shook my shoulder. Now, I'm not an expert on being choked to death, but I don't really think your supposed to shake the victim.

"Bells? Bells?" Laurent said, only..it wasn't Laurent's voice. The meadow faded and my eyelids opened to find Charlie staring at me.

"We're here, honey." Charlie pointed to the hospital. It wasn't a very big hospital, it was about the size of a high school. It was a cream color and had many windows for the patients to look out of. There were a couple of plants that framed the doorway and it had few cars in the parking lot. I got out of the cruiser and stretched my stiff muscles.

Charlie grabbed my bags and placed a reassuring hand on my shoulder. We entered the hospital and the scent of hand sanitizer and tissues filled my nostrils. I hate hospitals.

"How can I help you?" the office worker asked. She had blonde hair and big blue eyes. She was young and I glanced down at her name tag and it said "Charlotte".

"My daughter has an appointment," Charlie explained. Charlotte nodded and grabbed a clipboard filled with papers.

"What's you name, sweetheart?" she asked. I felt a bit embarrassed that a woman who was only a few years older than me was calling me "sweetheart". My cheeks turn red as I gave her my name. She nodded and wrote it down on a sheet of paper before handing Charlie the clipboard. She explained what things we needed to fill out and he nodded to show that he was listening.

We found a couple of empty seats, which wasn't difficult, and started on the paperwork. That's another reason why I hate hospitals, the annoying amount of papers to fill out. After what seemed like forever, we finished them and handed it back to Charlotte. She smiled warmly at me and told us that the doctor would be out in a few minutes.

~(*)~(*)~(*)~(*)~(*)~(*)~(*)~

"Isabella Swan?" the nurse called. Charlie and I stood up from our comfy chairs and he turned towards me.

"Well, I'm going to go get something to eat. I'll be back to come get you in a little while, okay?" I nodded. He gave me a side hug before heading for the front door. I took a deep breath and followed the nurse.

"Here we are. The doctor will be with you in just a moment," I nodded my thanks and she shut the door. I examined the room while I waited. It had the same aroma as the rest of the hospital, but it was stronger in here. On the left side of the room was a bed that had crinkly wax paper running down the middle of it. A scale and cabinet filled up the right side of the room, and a black chair was the only thing on the back wall. By the sink was a chair that had no arm rests or back, and it had six wheels that was made for the doctor only. I always wanted to roll around on one of those chairs, but I resisted.

I sat in the black chair and was thrilled to see a basket of magazines in them. I grabbed the first magazine and started thumbing through it. Most of the articles weren't that exciting, but I read them anyways so that I would have something to do. I was about to hunt for another magazine when the door opened.

"Hello, ma'am. I'm Dr. Cullen and it says here that-Bella?" Carlisle gasped.

**Poor Bella has the worst of luck. I am so sorry that y'all had to wait so long for an update. I'm very impatient when it comes to waiting for updates, and I hate to be a hypocrite :( Thank you for being so understanding and sending nice reviews. It meant a lot to me and it really made my day! I hope that this chapter was worth the wait!**


	8. Chapter 8

I cleared my throat and motioned for him to continue. He stared at me before finally putting the pieces together.

"Oh my God."

"Patient confidentiality," I interrupted. He can't tell them, no one should know about this. I don't want their pity, they lost the right to care about me when they left.

"How did this happen? You were nice and healthy before-"

"Before you left? Yes, I remember. Things change, Dr. Cullen. Can we please move on?" I snapped. He sat down and started thumbing through my file. I almost felt bad for the way I treated him, after all it wasn't his decision to leave. But he went along with it, and never offered a goodbye or tried to contact me.

He placed the files down on the desk, pulling me from my thoughts. He described the process in such great detail that even a baby could understand it. He listed the pros and cons and made sure I was willing to take the risk. I was, I'd do anything to stay on this Earth for Charlie. He needed me, I was all that he had.

Carlisle asked me another question, which I had failed to hear. I shot him an apologetic smile and asked if he could repeat it.

"When would you like to start your treatment?"

"As soon as possible," I replied. He nodded and started to make a list of dates before I interrupted him.

"I only want to try this a couple of times. If my body doesn't respond to the treatment, then I want to know. No exceptions," I demanded. I wasn't going to fool myself and Charlie into believing I'd live longer if it wasn't going to work. If it doesn't help then I'll live the rest of my days to the fullest.

"If that's what you want-"

"It is."

"Well then I will monitor your treatment and let you know as soon as possible if they aren't working," he explained. He gave me a forced smile before scrutinizing the details on my file.

"Thank you, I just don't want to keep prolonging the inevitable, you know?" I fingered the hem of my shirt, contemplating whether or not to apologize. I had basically just told him how afraid I was of dying. He didn't deserve to have this on his conscience, I had already put so much weight on his shoulders already.

"I understand. Do you mind if I ask you a question?" My heart fluttered in my chest. A question? What could he possibly need to know? I took a deep breath and chastised myself for being so dense. I wasn't really worried about hte question, I was more worried about how it would be perceived. Or, more importantly, who else would be perceiving it.

Carlisle waited patiently throughout my inner turmoil. His posture remained casual, and his hands were folded loosely on his desk. I cleared my throat and gave him my permission to ask away.

"If there should be any visitors to come to you home, I would just like for you to keep an open mind."

"What _kind_ of visitors?" I demanded through clenched teeth.

"My family." Tears welled in my eyes as anger and fear ripped through me. How _dare_ he promise not to say anything and then ask me to be nice if he breaks it? We had a deal, and he just broke it. Patient confidientiality? Yeah right. Doctors are liars. Why would he say anything? I don't want their pity. In fact, I don't want anything from them. They lost the right to offer sympathy when they left Forks.

I jumped to my feet, causing the chair to slide against the wall and pierce the silence. I glared at Carlisle before storming towards the door. He flew towards it, effectively blocking my escape route. I huffed and crossed my arms. Why do I always get stuck in repulsive situations? I motioned for him to get on with it. The sooner I got out of here, the better.

"I said I wasn't going to say anything and I meant it. But I think you're forgetting that there is a psychic in the household. And she won't hesitate to tell Edward," he explained. I flinched at his words. I can't believe I forgot to factor in Alice. If she doesn't know by now, then she will find out soon enough. I know how close she and Edward are, so it would only make sense if she told him. God my life is a mess.

"You're right. I'm sorry for accusing you of going back on your word. I really need to think things through. Thank you for everything, Carlisle. I'll see you next Friday." He nodded and smiled softly. He glided back to his desk and I took the opportunity to quickly get out of there. This is nothing like how I imagined the appointment would go.

**Carlisle's POV**

I tossed the phone in the passenger seat and clenched my jaw. It was just as I had feared. I had hoped that Alice wouldn't have a vision for a long time since Bella was still unsure about her future. She still isn't sure about what she is going to do, but she had enough of an idea to give Alice images. Vivid scenes that will haunt her for the rest of her existence. Hopefully she'll stay true to her word and wait till I get home before she starts freaking out.

The road seemed to go on forever. I pushed the gas well over 100 and it still seemed to go by slowly. I usually tried to keep the speed reasonable for appearances, but after all that has happened today I no longer had the patience.

Finally the concrete driveway sliced into the road and guided me towards the house. Alice waited outside with a blank expression with Jasper at her side. Her foot tapped relentlessly against the porch, beating in tune with her fingers. I barely had time to cut the engine and step out of the car before she started her endless questions.

"So is it true? Is there any chance she will be able to beat it?"

"Alice-"

"Will we change her if it comes down to it? Should we tell Edward? I think we should. He has a right to kno-"

"Alice!"

"What?" she huffed.

"Can you wait for just a second so I can explain?" She nodded and looked away from me. Her lips pressed firmly together as if to show that I had her full attention.

"Thank you. Yes, it is true. I won't know her chances against the cancer until we run some tests and see how her body responds to the chemo. And as for telling Edward, I'm not sure." Her eyes snapped to mine and it didn't take Jasper's gift to feel the anger bouncing off of her.

"You're not sure? Carlisle, she's the love of his life! If he finds out that we knew that Bella has cancer and we didn't tell him, he would never forgive us."

"What?" We snapped our heads to see Edward standing behind us with a murderous glare. This day just gets better and better.

"Now son, you need to calm down."

"Calm down? Are you kidding me? You just said that the reason for my existence is _dying_ and you expect me to be calm? God, why is this happening to her?" His expressions shifted between anger, fear, and regret. Never settling on a particular emotion, it was like his mind couldn't process what was happening around him.

"I need to go find her-"

"No you don't." Edward turned to me in shock. He clenched his fists and set his jaw. His body was practically shaking with the force of his anger.

"You really think she wants to see you after all you put her through? She's hurting Edward. Badly. She's still pretty bitter about this whole ordeal, and the last thing she needs is anymore stress on her body. Do I make myself clear?" I hated throwing his mistakes in his face, but he obviously wasn't thinking clearly. Besides, someone needs to be the logical one in this predicament.

"You're right, I'm sorry for getting angry. But I need to at least see her, Carlisle. I won't approach her, I promise. But you will keep me updated on her condition, correct?" I almost hesitated, but the heartbreaking look on his face made it impossible to refuse. His eyes looked dead, as if the light had been sucked out of him and replaced with only darkness. God, I hated to see my children in pain. It's one of the worst things a parent can witness.

I nodded solemnly and he smiled in thanks. He sprinted down the road, the leaves flowing behind in his trail. If only he had known that a simple visit could change everything.

**As you know, the updates have been very unorganized. So for now I think it would be best if I just post the chapters as quickly as possible instead of waiting and doing the previews. I'm not saying that I won't do them anymore, I'm just postponing them until I can organize the update dates. Anyways, what did you think of the chapter? Poor Bella, she just can't win :( Please R & R! Thanks :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Please excuse any errors, I didn't have the time to edit. Enjoy!**

Charlie tip-toed around the subject of the appointment. He knew how much it had upset me, so he tried not to pry. His anxiety shot up when I let it slip who my doctor was, and he pestered me with questions ever since.

"Did he mention Edward?" _Flinch_.

"Yes."

"Do you want to request a new doctor?"

"No."

"Are they coming back?"

"N-no." I whispered, my voice cracking. Charlie shot me a look of sympathy and gave up on the interrogation. I sighed in relief and went into the kitchen to make him some dinner. I was exhausted, but I forced myself to stay awake.

I opened the cabinet on top of the stove and grabbed the recipe box. I had started on it when I moved here, marking the ones that Charlie enjoyed the most. I flipped through them before finally stumbling on the one that said "spaghetti".

I smiled, it was one of the dishes I had made often whenever _he_ was here. It was the only human food that smelled somewhat decent to him. I tried to make it as much as possible, knowing that the others I fixed had a strong odor that disgusted him.

I hadn't made it since _they_ left, and I knew Charlie was most likely craving it. I grabbed a can of tomato sauce and a box of noodles. I grabbed some leftover hamburger meat and put it in the pan.

I grabbed a spatula and smoothed down the meat, patiently waiting for it to brown. Charlie walked into the kitchen with a sheepish smile gracing his lips. I looked at him questioningly and he sighed, looking down at the ground.

"Billy called. I forgot that we had made plans to watch the game," he explained.

"Oh okay. I'll leave you a plate in the microwave." He glanced over at the food and smiled.

"Are you sure? I can stay here and help you coo-"

"That's alright. Go watch some baseball, have a good time," I responded quickly. Charlie couldn't cook to save his life, so his assistance would be completely unnecessary. Besides, he deserved to have some fun, not stay here and babysit me.

"Thanks, Bells." I smiled and went back to flipping the meet. I heard the faint click of the door as he shut it, evoking a sigh of relief to leave my lips. Not that I mind if Charlie stays here, but his questions are a little overwhelming. I had barely any time to process things, much less enough time to give him a play-by-play of what happened.

The meat browned soon enough, and I slowly mixed in the sauce. I placed a strip of aluminum foil over it and grabbed a pot to boil the noodles. I filled up the pot with water and put a dash of salt in it for flavor. I sat down and waited for the water to boil, occasionally stirring the meat. I looked around the nearly dark house and realized how creepy it seemed.

It was already dark outside, so the only source of light was the one in the kitchen. I got up and turned on the light in the living room, feeling a bit more secure. I looked up at the bulb for a second before turning of the light and escaping into the kitchen. I was being ridiculous. The only thing I was doing was raising the electric bill by turning on unnecessary lights.

I checked on the food, struggling to distract myself, and noticed the water was starting to boil. I preheated the oven for the garlic bread and tossed the noodles into the water. I stirred the meat and noodles more than necessary, trying to keep myself preoccupied. But it was no use, my thoughts started to drift to _them_.

Does Alice know? And if she does did she tell him? Probably, I thought with a heavy heart. I had already made up my mind about what I was going to do, which would give her the perfect ammunition to evoke a vision.

Alice knows, of that I have no doubt. But what will she do with this information? Will she be like Carlisle and try not to think about it? Will she confront me? Will _he_?

I took a deep breath and forced myself to stop conjuring up questions. It won't help to focus on all the "what ifs". The only thing I can do is take things in stride. As long as I don't expect anything, then I won't be blind sided if something happens. Which I am almost positive that something will happen.

I looked down at the meal and noticed that the noodles were pretty much finished. I grabbed a strainer and placed it in the sink. I turned off the burner and poured the noodles into the strainer. I tossed it around a bit to make sure all of the water was drained.

The oven beeped, letting me know that it was preheated. I grabbed a pan, smacked a couple of pieces of garlic bread on it, and placed it in the oven. I set the timer and checked on the meat. I gave it a quick taste test to see if it was done. It burned my mouth a bit, but it tasted delicious. Satisfied, I grabbed a plate and poured a sufficient amount of noodles on it and repeated the process with the meat.

I put the leftovers in a large container and set them aside to cool off. I sat down at the table and waited for the garlic bread to cook so I could go to bed.

I looked at the timer and it showed that I only had to wait four more minutes. I yawned and snuggled into the chair, trying to get a bit more comfortable.

Exhaustion hit me as quick as a bullet. I tried to stand up so that I wouldn't fall asleep, but my body wouldn't cooperate. My eyelids slowly drifted closed and blackness consumed me.

I was running. I didn't know why I was running or how long I had been, but I knew that it was life or death. My breathing came out in short pants, my shoes beating against the mud incessantly. The moon was high in the sky, illuminating my otherwise dark path in the woods.

I could feel my legs starting to get weak, but I pushed myself harder. I wasn't going to let her get me. I dodged trees, jumped over stumps, and side-stepped stray animals. I was impressed with my agility. The sudden graceful quality making me a little sketchy, but I shrugged it off. Must be the adrenaline.

Thick clouds of smoke obscured my vision, forcing me to slow down. They were an angry black color, blowing in my face and causing my eyes to tear up. I closed my eyes for a minute, to clear the moisture, and lost my footing.

I looked up and saw a figure standing before me. The clouds of smoke made it hard to identify who it was, but the fiery red hair stuck out even through the haze. Victoria. She stepped closer, allowing me to get a better look at her cruel face.

Her eyes narrowed in disgust and her lips twisted into a predatory smirk. She knew she had won.

She crouched down in front of me, her lips parting slightly. She tried to speak, but a loud beeping was the only thing that sounded from her. Long, boisterous alarms continued to leave her lips. The scene started to fade, morphing into darkness..

I woke with a start. My breaths coming in short gasps as I looked around the room. It was completely filled with smoke, flames dancing inside of the stove. Coughs racked through my body as my hands waved frantically.

I ran over to the cabinet and pulled out a bunch of pot holders and threw them on the counter. I dived for the cabinet beneath the sink and yanked out the fire extinguisher. I switched the oven off, my eyes darting to the heat resistant utensils on the counter. I slipped them on, the pot holders molding to my hand perfectly, and quickly forced the oven open. Heat blasted from it, the radiation scorching my face.

I grabbed the fire extinguisher and quickly aimed it at the stove. I sighed in relief as the white foam scorched the flames, killing them off quickly. I opened up the kitchen window to try and force the smoke out, but it still didn't help the coughs still spewing from my mouth.

I inched towards the door, in desperate need of some clean air. My body moved slower than I would've liked, the smoke so thick I had to feel my way towards the exit. I fought to get air in my lungs, but all that I breathed was smoke. The coughs started becoming more wild, leaving few pauses in between.

It was like having something choke you from inside of your body. You can't even attempt to defend yourself since you can't control it. Black dots started lining my vision and I moved faster. Air left my lungs rapidly, my vision blurred, and it felt like everything around me was spinning.

My fingers curled around the door knob, twisting and pulling at it. The door opened just as the darkness began to pull me under. I took a step out of the doorway and fell to my knees.

"Bella!" A frantic, velvet voice yelled. My eyes darted to a figure with reddish-brown hair. My body was swept up in his arms, his lips forming words I couldn't make out. I caught a glimpse of _his_ golden eyes before everything went black. 


	10. Chapter 10

Thump-thump. Thump-thump. A steady rhythm attacked my head. It was one of the most powerful headaches I have ever endured. It was also the first thing I noticed was wrong with my body.

The second most prominent health issue was the burning in my throat. It felt as though someone had shot a flame thrower down my throat. A flame that licked at the sides of my esophagus, never stopping or decreasing in strength.

My eyes fluttered open, but I couldn't make out any of my surroundings. Everything was blurred, robbing me of the chance to find out where I was. I tried to sit up, but after a few inches off of the ground, the blinding pain in my head forced me down. I groaned in annoyance.

"Be careful. You'll probably need this," a voice mumbled. I couldn't pinpoint it from a memory, it was too fuzzy. Like trying to make out what someone was saying from underwater. My hand glided up and wrapped around something cold and smooth. A glass. I didn't care what the contents were, it could've been acid for all I knew, I pushed it towards my lips and greedily drank it.

I hadn't realized how thirsty I was until I had felt the cold liquid slither down my throat. It was gone in a matter of seconds, leaving my throat devoid of its previous ache.

"Would you like more?" a familiar voice chuckled. I shook my head and turned towards my savior. I squinted and barely made out a pair of golden eyes and wild, copper hair.

"Oh my," I gasped. I crawled to the far corner of the entryway and turned my body to face the wall. Of course the last person I wanted to see was right behind me. Just great.

"What are you doing here?" I demanded, coldly. Edward sighed and stood up, slowly pacing the hallway. I could practically see him grabbing at his hair, he always did it when he was anxious.

"I heard about your illness and I came to find you-"

"My cancer is none of your concern." I shifted away from the wall to glare at him. It was a bit irritating for him to already know about my condition, I was hoping I could have bought myself a little time by keeping my future undetermined.

"I don't want your sympathy, Edward. We're done, so there is no reason for you to be here. You can leave now," I said, glancing at the door for emphasis. A pained expression flashed across his features, his eyes burning with such an intensity I had to look away.

"You can't die, Bella. I won't let you," he whispered. I stared at him in disbelief, questioning his sincerity. _I won't let you._ What did he mean by that? Anger flared inside of me and I quickly jumped to my feet. I ignored the glaring pain in my head, it was the least of my worries as of now.

"You don't get to decide whether I live or not. Why do you even care? You made it perfectly clear in the woods that night that I should only take care of myself for Charlie. That's what I'm doing, Edward. I'm going to stay on this Earth for as long as I can, and when my time comes he will be able to accept , I'm doing what you wanted me to. So you can go now." I sighed, feeling a bit lighter for finally addressing that night. I couldn't pretend it didn't happen, and I certainly wouldn't.

"I can't keep lying, Bella. You deserve the truth. That night? Everything I said was a lie," he explained. I stared at him blankly, and he watched me with a guarded look, trying to judge my reaction. A lie? God, talk about digging the knife deeper. It stung that he would want to hurt me more than he already has.

"Don't," I whispered.

"No. You need to know the truth. I lied about everything I said to you that night. Every word. I did it to protect you. I figured that you would be safer with my family and myself out of you life. That you would finally get the chance to live your life the way you were supposed to."

"Please stop-"

"I only said all of those things so that you would let me go. So that you would see how I didn't deserve you," he finished.

"Well you did a pretty good job. Didn't seem like an act to me," I spat. Did he rehearse this? Did he plan out new ways to torture me? _Or, maybe he was just admitting his mistakes_, a small voice whispered in the back of my mind. A loud _thump _interrupted my thoughts, bringing my attention back to Edward. His hands clenched and unclenched at his sides as a wave of anger overtook him.

"Why won't you look at me, Bella? _Really_ look at me. How can you not see how much I love you? I made a mistake, I know, but I need you to understand that what I did was to protect you. I would understand if you never forgive me, but I can't go on letting you believe that I meant those words I said that night," he pleaded. For the first time since we started arguing, I was speechless. I averted my eyes away from him and walked into the kitchen. I grabbed a glass and filled it with water. My hand snatched the Advil from the cabinet and I flung a couple into my hand. I shoved the pills and water in my mouth and quickly swallowed.

I tried to process what he had just said, but there were too many things to sift through. I shouldn't believe him, after all he did break my heart, but there is always that little seed of doubt. The seed planted at the back of my mind that keeps me up all night in wonder of its accuracy. After all of those nights together, all the times he has saved my life, and the words that were said, it would make sense if he lied that night.

He has always been overprotective when it comes to me. If he really felt nothing for me, then how would he be able to act through all of the time we spent together. It just didn't add up.

"Please, don't ignore me. I don't think I can handle it at this point," he whispered. The pain lacing his voice surprised me, it wasn't hidden and it sounded strikingly sincere.

"I'm not ignoring you, I'm just thinking" I mumbled.

"I can give you something to think about," he whispered. His golden eyes captured me and I couldn't look away from them as he slowly walked forward. It was like everything was speeding up and slowing down at the same time. I knew what was about to happen, but I couldn't force myself to stop it.

My mind was stuck in the past, remembering all of the heated moments that had passed between Edward and I. There was never a dull moment back then, and I would give anything to be able to go back to that time and stay there.

Edward stood in front of me and glanced down at my lips. I closed my eyes, giving him the opportunity to either back out or jump in.

I didn't have to wait long, I was soon assaulted by the cold, smooth texture of his lips as they molded with mine. His hands wrapped securely around my waist, pulling me even closer to him. I locked my hands around his neck, diving into the soft curls at the nape of his neck.

The counter pressed into my back as I got completely lost in the kiss. Unfortunately, the need for air became apparent and I was forced to pull away.

"Well that was certainly something to think about," I panted. Edward smirked and leaned down to kiss my neck. Suddenly, he stopped and his body went rigid.

"Bells? You home?"

**Hmm..I wonder what is in store for this couple. Next chapter will be the confrontation with Charlie and the appointment. Please R&R! :)**


	11. Chapter 11

I listened intently for his footsteps to barrel into the kitchen, demand that Edward leaves, and shoot an accusing glare at me. However, it never came. Instead he went back out the door to retrieve something from the cruiser. I turned back to Edward, knowing I only had a matter of seconds before Charlie would find us.

I pushed away from his lean form, ignoring the confusion bubbling across his features. "You need to leave. This was a mistake, I'm sorry."

I maneuvered past him and headed for the laundry room. My fingers brushed the dryer, checking for the familiar vibration notifying me that it wasn't done. There weren't any. Just as I was pulling the lid open, I felt the familiar tingle of Edward's presence.

"Bella, please. I know-"

"No you don't Edward. You don't know half of the things I went through while you were gone. I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, and I couldn't even pretend to hang out with my friends for Charlie's sake. Do you know what it's like to have a consistent nightmare haunt you everytime you sleep?" I cried. A wave of exhaustion hit me, causing me to lean on the dryer to support my weight.

"I know you did what you did to protect me, but that's not how it worked. I can't handle this extra stress right now, Edward" I explained. Pain and guilt spreaded throughout his darkening eyes at my words. He moved to wrap me in his arms but I held up my hands for him to stop. I wouldn't be able to push him away if I was in the comfort of his arms, it's hard enough to attempt it now.

The door opened again and I heard the whip of Charlie's belt as he removed it. "Go," I mouthed to Edward. I turned around and threw all of the clothes into an empty basket. By the time I was done he had disappeared, leaving behind the faint scent of honey suckle.

I took a deep breath to relax my frantically beating heart. Guilt flowed through me, cold and menacing. Should I have sent Edward away? Was it selfish of me to bring up the times when he was away?

My fingers curled around my hair and tugged at it in frustration. It may not have been fair to bring up when he left, but it wasn't fair of him to leave me for protection. What if he lied about it? What if he only came back to mess with my head?

Well, if that were the case, then he would be very disappointed. I had made the mistake of letting him stomp on my heart once, I wasn't about to do it again.

The slap of paper flying on a smooth surface interrupted my thoughts. I quickly emerged into the kitchen to find Charlie waiting for me. His hands were folded neatly in front of him and the paper was laying on the other side of the table.

After a quick hand gesture from Charlie, I hesitantly sat in the chair across from him. "I know you have become fond of the woods, but I need you to stay away from them. There have been a few killings and we haven't tracked down the murderer yet."

I felt the breath fly out of my body at his words. Killings? Forks was such a small town, why would anyone pick it as a place to commit such heinous crimes. Charlie stood up and moved towards the fridge. "I'm sorry, Dad. I didn't have enough time to make you dinner."

"It's alright, kid. You've had a lot on your mind these past few weeks." I offered him a weak smile, which he quickly returned. Turning back to the paper, I gently picked it up and studied its contents.

_**It seems the small town of Forks, Washington have stumbled across a serial killer. Police have been on a wild goose chase looking for the three murder victims found today. Timothy Smith, age 34, was discovered just south of Forks. Along with Daniel Murray, age 5, and Shelly Cooper, age 27. **_

_**"It was one of the strangest things I've ever seen," Chief Swan says, "all of the bodies were drained of blood. There wasn't a speck of DNA from the killer on any of 'em."**_

_**Police say that it will be even more difficult to find the murderer seeing as there aren't any patterns. All three of the victims differ in gender, age, and size. An even stranger discovery was that all of the victims were found in one area. They were out in the open, not even a small attempt to cover the bodies. **_

_**"It was a creepy sight to behold," Officer William adds, "the bodies were aligned in a 'V'. Like the killer was trying to send a message. **_

A gasp escaped my lips and I threw the paper down. My heart beat frantically in my chest and air seemed to avoid my lungs. It was certainly a message, but not for the police.

When I had read Charlie's statement, I just assumed it was a wandering vampire stopping in for a meal. A nomad looking for a quick fix before heading to new territory.

I even went so far as to making myself believe that the "V" shape was an abbreviation for vampire. It wasn't until I read the part about referring it to a message that comprehension grasped my mind. Victoria.

With all the flurry of activities that had gone on, she had completely slipped my mind. Should I ask the Cullens for guidance in this situation? Surely a clan of vampires would know how to handle one vicious one.

I sighed and quickly dispelled the thought. It was bad enough they knew about my illness, the last thing I wanted was to worry them with a vengeful vampire.

I cleared my mind of any negative thoughts and decided to mull it over later. I sluggishly left the kitchen and found Charlie on the couch watching a game, blissfully unaware of the danger his daughter was in. I mumbled a goodnight and left for a night of dreamless sleep.

~*IWGU*~

A soft glow filled my room, a hint of the sun peeking through the clouds. My eyes slowly opened, a yawn breaking through my outstretched lips. I moved slowly out of the warm, comfy bed and padded to the kitchen.

"Dad?" I called. I scoured the living room, the kitchen, and his bedroom but he was no where to be found. Panic started to swell in my chest, he was supposed to be off today. I looked around the kitchen, praying he might have left some sort of clue behind, when I stumbled upon a letter. It was a small post-it note attached to the refrigerator by a small magnet.

_Bells, _

_Went fishin' with Billy. Don't worry about dinner. Go see Jake, he misses you. _

_Love, _

_Dad_

Of course that was where he'd be. A nice day out with him being off work was the perfect scenario for him. How I didn't come to that conclusion was beyond me.

As for the Jake part, I wasn't exactly sure of what I wanted to do. The last time I had hung out with him was to gain information about the Cullens. I had used him to get what I wanted, and I highly doubted he would take that lightly.

I pushed the decision to the back of my mind, choosing to prepare a quick breakfast instead. My stomach growled, reminding me that I hadn't eaten last night. I grabbed a pack of bacon, a handful of sausage, and enough batter to make a few pancakes. I made plenty of extra for Charlie on the off chance he came home hungry.

The meal was cooked in a matter of minutes and my stomach was filled to the brim in no time. I put all of the extra food on a plate and stuck it in the microwave in case he decided to eat some.

With breakfast now taken care of, my mind started to wander to the chores around the house. I was behind and could definitely afford to get a head start on them, but I didn't have the energy today. Besides, Charlie probably wouldn't notice if I waited until tomorrow to finish the laundry and other equally lacking areas.

Now that I had nothing but free time, it couldn't hurt to stop by Jake's place. Dealing with all of the vampire drama had really taken a toll on my stress level, and a visit from an old friend would really help.

I grabbed a coat, just in case the rain decided to rear its ugly head in, and my keys on the way out the door. Not wanting to take any chances, I quickly locked the door before heading to the truck. The key clicked in the ignition, waking up my beast of a truck.

I was startled by a sudden shriek behind me. My head whipped around to find an elderly woman jogging by the house, glaring daggers at my truck. I fought the laughter bubbling to my lips and offered her an apologetic wave. She ignored me, mumbling something about teenagers and their obnoxious cars.

I rolled my eyes and slowly pulled out of the driveway. I waited a second to give the woman some time to get ahead of me, then gunned the engine. The look of terror, which eventually morphed into anger, had me laughing so hard that I almost had to pull over. Taking a swift glance to the rear view mirror allowed me the opportunity to get a nice look at her middle finger shaking in the air.

This was the most care-free I had been in weeks. I smiled at the revelation, it was the best feeling in the world to feel so at ease. I rolled down my windows and turned on my brand new stereo. I had decided to keep their gift since they weren't the ones to break my heart. _No, they were just the ones to leave you_, my mind whispered.

Gritting my teeth, I turned the stereo up loud. I flipped through the stations, finding that most were either romantic songs or depressing tunes that were created to help you when you were feeling down. I ignored all of them and finally settled on an upbeat, country song. "Country Must Be Country Wide" was blaring through the speakers as I stopped at a tragically slow red light. I could feel people staring at me from all around, their obnoxiously curious eyes burning a hole in my head, but I chose to ignore them.

My eyes were trained on the glowing red light, silently praying for it to hurry up and morph into green. The awkward stares were almost enough to make me roll up my windows and run back home with my tail in-between my legs. Almost.

I sighed in relief when the light changed and quickly drove along the familiar road to Billy's. In the blink of an eye I was in front of the tell tale red house. It looked vacant, but I could hear the rowdy hollering of a group of teenage boys in the backyard.

Mustering the bit of courage I possessed, I hopped out of the chevy and stumbled along the narrow driveway. Before I could reach the door, Jacob sprung out from behind the house. His appearance was startling. He had short, cropped black hair and only wore a pair of worn-out blue jean shorts.

"Hey Jake-"

"You shouldn't be here," he mumbled, coldly. His dark, brown eyes darted from mine to an area behind us. My eyes were trained on his face, trying to find any regret or indecision, but all I found was anger. "Charlie said that you had been missing me an I really wanted to see you-"

"Well it's too late, Bella. You waited too long to show up." His eyes grew misty, as if he didn't want to say the words, but knew that he had to. What event was so major that he couldn't spare a few minutes for a visit?

"If I wait any longer I'm goin to be six feet under the next time you see me," his eyes grew wide and he stared at me in disbelief.

"How did you know about this?"

"That I have cancer? Let's see you go to a doctor and they run some tests-"

"You have cancer?" he whispered. His eyes grew even wider and his face paled. Had I not been talking with him, I would've thought he was sick. His eyes looked wild and couldn't concentrate on anything for too long, as though the information had left his mind going a million miles a minute.

"Yeah, isn't that what you were talking about?" I asked. His crazed eyes returned to mine and his head slowly shook. Before I could respond, another teenager that resembled Jacob emerged from the backyard.

"I thought you told her to leave," he barked, his eyes glaring at Jake. I felt a sudden overwhelming urge to defend Jake and snapped my eyes back to his face.

"I don't believe that's any of your business. Can you give us a minute, please?" I snapped back. His head whipped back to look at me, his anger seeming to make him shake. "Paul, calm down-"

"Calm down? The only thing keeping her alive is us, and she wants to pick fights?" he yelled. Jake pushed him back, trying to tell him to let it go, but he wouldn't listen. He seemed to tremble even more than before.

Everything seemed to happen in fast forward. A pack of teenagers ran out from the backyard, yelling obscenities at Paul. My eyes darted back to the man in question, his eyes focused on my face as he began to tremble so fast that he was a blur. Suddenly, he jumped in the air and his body morphed into the biggest wolf I've ever seen in my life. His pants were shredded and layed beside his massive form.

One of the La Push kids started barking orders, and then he too changed into a wolf. His fur a startling black, and his stance one of authority. He chased Paul into the woods, like a parent taking a small child to time out.

Jake called for me, snapping me back to reality. I turned away from him, not wanting to see the vulnerable look in his eyes, and ran for my truck. I could hear him pacing behind me, struggling to decide if he wanted to follow me or those.._things._

I hurried to the truck and revved it up. My foot pressed down hard on the gas pedal, pleading with the vehicle to move faster. Jacob jumped in front of the truck, yelling for me to let him explain.

I swerved and barely missed hitting his right side. I chanced a glance in the rear view mirror to see if he was trailing behind me, but he stood in the same spot. His eyes captivated mine, begging for something I couldn't give him. Tears pooled in my eyes as I realized I would probably never see him again.

~*IWGU*~

A sense of dread pooled in my stomach when I reached the house. As though something evil was lurking, waiting for my arrival to torture me. I shoved away the feeling, pining it off to the sight I had recently endured.

On the ride over I had struggled ot think of a possible memory of the Cullens speaking of werewolves. They had never mentioned the species, but something about them seemed so blatantly obvious. As though I had the missing piece of the puzzle, but I didn't know where to put it.

I quickly pushed it to the back of my mind, deciding that I had endured enough drama for the day. I stumbled up the small stretch between the porch and my truck. My balance was significantly effected from the lack of sleep I so desperately needed.

When I reached the door, I felt chills roll throughout my body. It was cracked, something that would not have been possible unless someone had a key. Unfortunately, Charlie was still fishing with Billy. At that moment I felt my adrenaline begin to pump, warning me that if I tried to avoid whoever lies beyond the door, they would follow me.

I cautiously pushed the door open and flipped the switch on in the hallway. A gasp escaped my lips, causing her crimson eyes to dart to mine.

"Well, well, well. If it isn't the Cullens' little pet," her sickly, sweet voice purred.

**I hope this was a good enough update to satisfy your curiosity long enough for me to update my other two stories. Some of you were complaining that she was too quick to let Edward in, and I have to admit that I agreed, but there will be eventual Bella/Edward. Please R & R! Thanks :)**


	12. Chapter 12

""Make yourself at home. After all, it is yours," she grinned. I glared at her, gently brushing off my worn out sneakers. She stood up gracefully, breezing past me as she shut and locked the door.

"What do you want?" I growled through clenched teeth. Victoria's eyes danced with bloodlust, turning her irises into a deadly shade of black. She motioned for me to sit in the arm chair, but I stood my ground. Her smug expression evaporated into irritation, provoking her to give me a swift and powerful nudge towards the living room.

It would have merely been a shove to any normal person, but with my terrible balance it sent me sprawling to the floor. My nose hit the ground hard, blood spurting out of it from the impact. I quickly bunched up my shirt and covered it over the wound, glancing warily at Victoria.

She flew across the room, struggling to channel in her bloodlust. She cornered herself against the far wall of the living room, inhaling the scent of my blood like it was a drug. After a few deep breaths, her eyes returned to the startling shade of red. A composed smile graced her lips, showing me that she was in control.

"What do I want?" she wondered, aloud. A perfectly manicured finger rose to her chin, rhythmically tapping it as she pretended to think over her answer. "Well I want revenge, of course. A mate for a mate."

I stared at her blankly, questions buzzing around in my mind like a bee hive. Did she really not know that Edward and I are over? How long had she been in Forks? Surely the Cullens would've come across her scent by now if she's been here for a while.

"You must not have done your research. Edward and I are broken up," I whispered, tears springing to my eyes. It didn't matter whether she believed me or not, I was going to die at her hand sooner or later.

"Yes, I did catch the tail end of your staged break-up. Very realistic, you had me going for a second-" she started but I quickly cut her off. "It wasn't 'staged'. It was the real deal. If you want me dead, then go ahead. He won't care anyways."

Her cold eyes scrutinized my face, searching for any signs of dishonesty, but there weren't any. A look of surprise stretched across her eyes, which quickly turned into irritation.

"This won't do. How am I to get my revenge if he no longer cares for you?" she muttered to herself. Her long, pale legs paced the width of the room as she tried to figure out a plan B. I diverted my eyes from her, she was walking so fast it was making me dizzy.

I pulled the ruined shirt away from my nose, satisfied to see there wasn't any fresh blood. I slowly walked into the kitchen, silently communicating to Victoria that I had no intention of trying to escape. Turning on the faucet, I grabbed a small paper towel and submerged it into the warm water. After it was consistently dripping, I dabbed it against my nose. I methodically wiped away the dry blood and delved into my thoughts.

Should I tell her that death would be pointless since I'm already dying? Or would that make her even more frustrated? Now that she knows Edward no longer cares for me, how could she use me as revenge? Maybe she wouldn't use me at all, but then what would she use?

My throat closed up as I realized the only thing that could hit him where it hurts. His family. I couldn't let her hurt them, no matter what happens with Edward I would always care for them.

I had to think of an idea she could use to her benefit, something that would be far better than killing me. Even if I figured out a plan, how would I ease her into it without sending off a red flag? I sighed in defeat, my shoulders slumping from the stress.

I dragged my feet back into the living room, watching Victoria continuously pace. She kept muttering things to herself, her voice too low to reach my own ears. After a minute of talking she would stop, her hands fisted against her sides as she dispelled the thought. If it weren't for the fact that she was plotting my torture, it would actually be sort of comical.

"Victoria?" I asked, innocently. She stopped and snapped her head towards me. The blank look in her eyes showed how consumed she was in her thoughts. She stared at me as if she had suddenly realized that she was holding me captive. Psychotic vampire.

"Have you figured out your revenge, yet?" I asked in a bored tone. Her eyes flashed with annoyance, but she answered anyways. "Well I can't really do anything with you, so I was thinking about killing Edward. He did kill James after all."

Horror gripped my heart like a vice, making breathing difficult. I feigned a blank expression, but on the inside I was falling apart. Victoria looked frustrated by my lack of a response, obviously trying to provoke a reaction out of me.

"You could do that, but then he would never suffer. It's like giving a teenager a slap on the wrist for doing coke. What kind of revenge would that be?" I mumbled hypothetically. It hurt to talk about Edward's death so casually, but that was the only way I could speak of it without tipping her off. Victoria threw her hands up in the air before slapping them against her hips. "Then what would you suggest, Mrs. Know-It-All?"

"He never wanted me to be changed. He thought it would be damning my soul. I think he only said it at the time so that he wouldn't have to deal with me for eternity." I abhorred telling her about a piece of my personal memories, but there was a good chance it would throw her off of her previous mindset. She had listened intently to my words, tossing them around in her mind. A light bulb went off in her head and a cruel smile graced her lips.

It disgusted me that she was so blinded by revenge. She didn't even notice that I was basically giving her the idea for Edward's downfall. She went on to tell me of her grand plan, making sure to make it as detailed as possible. I didn't react to any of it, I simply sat and listened to my fate.

It wasn't that I wanted to be changed, the thought had lost it's fervor once I realized I wouldn't be sharing my life with Edward. I'd rather suffer without him for the rest of eternity than to have his life taken.

A small part of me, a _very_ small part, hoped that he would want to be with me. I would no longer be the fragile human that trips over air, I would be a strong, beautiful vampire. Maybe he would see me for who I am, flaws and all, and realize that we belong together.

Victoria snapped me out of my thoughts, tellling me it was time. I stood up as she swooped in and pulled me over her shoulder. She didn't even attempt to do so gently, forcing me to grind my teeth so she wouldn't receive the pleasure hearing my pain.

She walked casually out the front door, checking for any signs that would show our encounter. Satisfied that there weren't any, she locked the door and ran into the woods. After a few moments of watching the trees blur by my face at speeds unimaginable, I shut my eyes tightly.

The dizzy spell didn't end when I cut off my vision, the constant jostling kept prolonging it. Just when my stomach when my stomach would begin to settle, she would dodge a branch and dive my body down with hers. It was like riding the deadliest roller coaster known to man.

Eventually she finally came to a stop, tossing me onto the ground. I stayed down, methodically rubbing my temples until my headache was bearable. Squinting against the rare rays of sunshine, I took in my surroundings.

We were still in the woods, trees blocked us off everywhere apart from a small gap to my left. I peered through it, studying the familiar stream of water laying beside it. A small gasp of horror bubbled to my lips as recognition hit me like a bucket if ice cold water. I looked beyond it, praying that it was just a familiar setting and that I was wrong. I wasn't.

The Cullen house stood as tall and elegant as ever, striking terror in my fragile heart. I had hoped she would take me to a secluded spot during the change. She could even throw me in front of them as soon as the change was complete. That would have been a more sensible option, but of course Victoria wouldn't want to go about this the right way. She wanted them to hear me suffer throughout the change, maybe even have to put up with me during the newborn stage.

"Well, let's get this over with before they try to stop us," she purred. Before I could protest, her teeth dug into the thin skin covering my neck. Fire spread throughout my veins as the venom shot into my system. Her hands caressed my neck, sucking my blood greedily. A shimmer of hope sprouted in my mind. Maybe the bloodlust would be too much for her and she would just kill me instead.

This renewed hope placed a small smile on my face. I could feel my life slipping through my fingers, the fire becoming even more intense. Just as I thought she would finish the job, she pulled away. Her cold hand patted my cheek and she offered a half-hearted 'good luck'.

A scream bubbled in my throat, barely making it past my lips as the fire spread to my heart. Victoria bolted, leaving behind nothing but a cool breeze. My body thrashed against the plush ground, a scream of agony bursting through my lips.

Distressed yells erupted somewhere to my left, but I shrugged them off. The voices didn't matter, they couldn't extinguish the fire burning inside of me. I squeezed my eyes shut, balling patches of grass inside of my fists. Another scream ripped from my throat, my head tipping back from the force of it.

The shouting grew closer and closer until I could practically feel the vibrations from their voices. They sounded so familiar, but I couldn't figure out who they were. The only thing I could concentrate on was the pain, and I knew it wasn't going to end anytime soon.

**Poor Bella, she's too loyal for her own good. So what did you think? Did you see that coming? Please R&R! :)**


	13. Chapter 13

Fire twirled and pranced throughout my veins in an agonizing and repetitive way. I wanted to scream and thrash while flailing my arms and legs to put out the burn, but it was no use. My body felt as though it were being forced down by the weight of the world, flames unfurling and licking the contours of my throat.

I needed something to ground me, to distract me from the relentless fire, so I began to count the days. As of now it had been at least a week since the first flicker of venom weaved through my veins. Something kept whimpering in the back of my mind, a small nagging feeling telling me that this had been ongoing for far too long.

My mind would dip in and out of consciousness, allowing me to soak in reality before pulling me back into the dark caves of Hell. Usually I would just hear nothing, but I always felt a cold grasp clutching at my hand. I didn't know whose it was, but it was oddly comforting and felt amazing against my heated skin.

Other times there would be mumbling between a few people and of course the voices were too low for me to decipher, excluding a few small fragments. I always tried to work out how they fit together, like pieces in a puzzle, but they varied too much to arrive at one lone conclusion. I loathed being the odd one out, yet it was also comforting that I wasn't clued in. If I had been, then I would be agonizing over the missing information I was missing while I was unconscious.

Most of the time I would just listen to the texture of the voice that remained beside me. It was so smooth with a hint of raw emotion, kind of like a silk robe with frayed ends. It was so beautiful and alluring, yet it needed a little mending to reach its full potential.

I wanted to comfort him and assure him that he would be fine, but I couldn't force even a sigh to burst from my lips. So I substituted my voice with a soft squeeze to his hand, more like a slight twitch of my fingers. No matter how small the movement, it always evoked a sigh of relief. A brush of his lips would be placed to my hand in gratitude, which was my personal favorite of the two. My heart had already fall into this man'd hands and I haven't even been allowed the pleasure of seeing him.

That realization struck me so suddenly that it stole the breath in my lungs. I felt airless, like nothing was weighing me down anymore. There was no heat, no venom, just independence. The only thing that anchored me to this world was him and his mystic touch. My heart busted with energy before stopping all together. I gasped in shock and wrenched my eyes open in bewilderment.

The ceiling light was the first thing that entered my enhanced vision. I looked at the rays of light in awe, I couldn't rip my eyes away even if I wanted to. All of the different colors of the spectrum, the tiny particles drifting through the beams, even the light coat of dust was now vivid. The man beside me whispered my name, instantly breaking me from th e trance I had sunken into. I turned to him with a vibrant smile, joy spreading throughout my body at finally receiving the opportunity to see him.

The sight before me was completely different than I expected. I jumped back from the table and curled against the farthest wall in the room. My body folded in on itself as I tried to protect myself from the wrath of the dangerous creature before me.

He had beautiful, bronze locks that reached just shy of his eyebrows. Full, dark eyebrows curved above his dark, black eyes. Dark p

ink, plump lips were parted in astonishment, as though he were too shocked to speak. He stood and threw his arms up to show that he meant no harm, but it only caused fear to grip me tighter.

"Bella," he breathed, pain lacing his silky voice. It was _him_, I realized with a heavy heart. The one who had stuck by me throughout my transformation, the one who had whispered reassurances in my ear hardships, was the one who would be my ultimate downfall.

I felt tears swirl my vision, causing his lean figure to become a mess of blurred colors. I wrapped my arms around my knees and rested my head against them. Of course the man that I had fallen for, the loyal occupant of the seat by my side, was the one who had abandoned me. The redhead had warned me of him, she had preached of his betrayal and how I was never again to trust him.

Her words were spoken through a haze of pain, so I only caught bits and pieces. Of course the picture she created was vivid enough to haunt me for the rest of eternity. I knew from the first time I looked in his deep, black eyes that it was him, the one who had shattered my heart. He seemed so innocent, as though he was surprised by my actions, but I knew it was all an act. How could he possibly expect for me not to fear him? He _left _me, he stole my heart and then stomped on it without a shed of remorse.

"Carlisle, Alice I need your help," Edward beckoned. His voice was so low, as though he were talking to me rather than them, that it stunned me when two figures appeared in the door way. The first one had blonde, wavy hair that slithered around his ears and had a pair of golden eyes to match. He was about the same height as Edward, he also had the same beautiful features as Edward, but you could tell the man had quite a few years under his belt. Wisdom practically radiated from him, yet there was only surprise when he heard of our dilemma.

The second one was a short, petite woman. She looked around the same age as Edward, but had a barely-concealed energetic quality about her. It was strange to see her look so serious as she eyed me, she seemed almost _defeated._

_"_Bella, do you remember who I am?" the blonde man-who I assumed was Carlisle-asked. I glanced at Edward before hesitantly shaking my head. Carlisle's eyes widened in shock and Edward flinched at my response.

It didn't make sense that they were so devastated by this. Wouldn't they be happy that I didn't remember them? I wouldn't have to burden them with my presence, I could live freely as a nomad. They would never have to be bothered by me ever again.

"What was the last thing you remember?" Carlisle asked speculatively. My eyebrows pulled together as I tried to remember that night. That night was the last I remember from my human life, the rest is gone. It was like a home video that was taped over, only the film has yet to be filled.

"I remember that woman, the redhead-I believe her name is Victoria. Anyways, she kept mentioning the Cullens, which I'm assuming is all of you, and contemplating how to execute her revenge. I needed to save someone from her wrath-I don't remember who but I do know that I sincerely loved them-so I sacrificed myself. She changed me and that was the end of it," I summarized. They didn't deserve a play-by-play of that night, and the pain that remembering evoked certainly wasn't worth the effort.

Edward fell back into his seat, his hands gripping tightly at his hair. He looked so heartbroken, so _vulnerable, _that my arms ached to reach out and comfort him. The only thing thag held me back was the constant reminder of his betrayal. He was dangerous, I couldn't put my heart on the line again just so he can break it.

"Bella, do you have any burning in your throat?" Alice asked. I instinctively shot my hand up and wrapped it around my neck. My eyes fell to the floor as I tried to locate any burning but it was very subtle. I knew I could handle it if need be, yet it was very irritating. It was like having a mosquito bite you can't scratch, the more you think about it the more it itches.

"Yes," I mumbled. I swallowed a few times, yearning for the aggravating burn to disappear, but it resisted. My eyes traveled to Carlisle's face for guidance. He gave a slight nod and turned towards Edward, lightly shaking his shoulder to get his attention.

"She needs to hunt. I presume you have a few questions, so who would you like to-"

"I'll take her," Edward answered, emphatically. He looked over at me before standing up to face Carlisle. "It's my fault she's in this mess anyways, the questions can wait."

He nodded and looked back at me, his eyes were soft and welcoming. Carlisle asked me to follow them and I did so without a second thought. Carlisle was so pure and sweet, there was no way he would let Edward hurt me again.

They walked down the hallway and opened a door further down on the left. My pace was a lot slower than theirs, so by the time I had reached the room they were all standing beside an open window.

"We're going to have to jump out the window and head off that way-" Edward began, but I quickly interrupted.

"You really are trying to kill me aren't you? There's no way I would survive that jump!" I exclaimed. Edward winced as though I had slapped him, his eyes filling with shame. Carlisle gazed at him with sympathy, an apology on the verge of his tongue, but Edward ignored it. Carlisle cleared his throat, offered me a half-hearted smile, and beckoned me to the window with a wave of his hand.

"You're one of us now, the jump won't kill you." I took small steps forward and stopped a couple of feet in front of the window. I leaned over a little and gasped at how far down the ground was. It seemed as though the plush, green grass was trying to escape my sight the longer I looked at it. "It's not as scary as it looks, I'll show you."

Edward hopped onto the ledge and bent his knees in a slight crouch. He looked me in the eye once before flinging himself out the window. Seeing him in the air was one of the most thrilling and terrifying sights I have ever seen. The wind kicked and swirled around him as he fell, rumpling the sides of his shirt so that I could make out a sliver of his stomach.

My breathing stopped when he neared the ground. Immortality certainly helps situations such as this one, but I couldn't contain the irrational fear for his safety. A scream burst through my lips when his feet touched the ground, causing him to stagger a bit in the landing.

Before I could comprehend what was happening, or that he was clearly fine, I had flung myself over the ledge. I faintly felt the air slicing all around, but the feeling alone only added to my worry over Edward. Instead of landing on the ground, like I had subconsciously aimed for, I landed right on Edward.

He fell back under the force of my fall, his hand clutching my body to his as we fell onto the soft grass. My breath caught in my throat as I felt the alluring shocks that accompanied his touch. The blades of green curled around Edward's bronze locks, making his beautiful features stand out against the dull grass. "Are you okay?" I whispered.

A burst of laughter fell from his lips. His eyes slipped shut as wave after wave of chuckles racked his torso. I was a little offended that he was making fun of me, but I couldn't help but join in. Only I could be clumsy enough to potentially injure someone in the process of seeing if they were okay.

"I am perfectly fine," he answered after his laughter died down. A small smile pulled at his lips and his eyes looked intensely into mine. His fingers brushed away the hair in my face and tucked them behind my ear. I sighed in contentment at his touch, it was so warm and inviting that I wanted to wrap myself in it and stay there forever.

His eyes captured mine and I knew I couldn't look away even if I wanted to. There was so much depth behind his dark eyes, so many years of anguish and loneliness. From that point on I knew I couldn't leave until there was warmth and happiness shining in his eyes.

**So what do you think? Not too sappy I hope. I know I have completely failed at sending out sneak peeks, so if you want one then include it in your review or PM me :) Sorry the update has taken so long, with school back in it has been very tough to update. Please R&R! :)**


	14. Chapter 14

Edward and I delved deeper into the woods, listening to the light crunch of leaves as they withered beneath our feet. The tension between us had increased ten-fold since the jumping incident. I could feel his eyes studying me, but I didn't acknowledge his stares. He was a stranger. A threat, as far as I knew.

"How much longer until we get there?" I groaned. It felt as though my body was stuck in slow motion, like the hare traveling at the same speed as the tortoise. The strange feeling had me puzzled. We were already almost jogging, there shouldn't be any sense of restraint.

"Well it may take a couple of hours at the rate we're going. I wanted to take it easy on you after the window ordeal," he teased.

I ducked my head and kept walking. His words swirled in my mind, making me curious as to how we were holding back. Testing my abilities, I ran as fast as my feet would carry me. I dodged tree stumps, weaved through rotting trees, and flew past stray branches.

A giggle of amazement burst from my lips, echoing through the trees at a rapid pace. I had never felt so free and alive before in my life. Suddenly, I felt the slight quake of another pair of feet gliding along the forest floor. I stopped, suddenly registering that I had completely forgotten about Edward in my adrenaline-induced haze. As I turned, I felt a gush of wind blow his tantalizing scent as he skidded to a stop in front of me.

"Wow, can you put on your brake lights next time?" he chuckled, nervously. I smiled apologetically. "Are we almost there?"

"Yes, we just need to cross that river first." I looked beside us, peering through the trees to find a wide, flowing river nestled a few yards away. I gulped and slowly edged toward the bank of the river, my eyes trailing the distance between where we stood and the soft, plush grass on the opposite side.

"Can't we just swim across?" I groaned. He shook his head and pulled my chin up so I was looking into his eyes. "Remember the feeling of running, how exhilarating it is for your body to move at such speeds?" I nodded and he continued.

"Just channel that adrenaline into jumping. It's not nearly as hard as it looks. Would you like me to go first?" I managed a small nod, his eyes dancing with amusement. Edward backed a few feet away from the river, his body leaning forward slightly as he stopped. He winked at me before racing forward, bending his knees slightly as he bounced off the bank.

I watched in awe as his body soared through the air, he was so graceful that it nearly took my breath away. Edward landed with a soft _thud _on the other side, his body turning around as he waited for me to cross.

After a couple of deep breaths, I backed away from the river until I was in a good spot for a running start. My eyes trained on the edge where the ground met the water as my feet pushed me towards the ledge. Once I reached it, I crouched slightly and used all of my strength to pound my feet against the damp grass.

A grin spread across my lips as I flew across the river. The wind wrapping around my body in a cooling, yet exciting, sensation. My landing went well past Edward-a few hundred yards at least-but it wasn't nearly as graceful. I tumbled through a tree and flopped down a few branches before settling at the bottom.

Edward checked to make sure I was okay, his tentative fingers gently pulling stray leaves out of my hair. I assured him I was fine and rambled about how amazing it felt to soar the air like that. He smiled and listened without interrupting or showing any signs of boredom. "Have we reached this place you've been looking for, yet?"

He nodded and pointed over to a patch of open land. I flew over to the spot and waited impatiently for him to follow. He smirked and walked slowly, enjoying the burning glare I was giving him. I huffed in annoyance as he finally swiveled in front of me.

The playful smirk twisting his lips dropped as a look of concentration took over his features. He gently grasped my shoulder as he began spewing out instructions.

"Close your eyes and focus only on your senses. Listen for animals grazing, smell for scents, let your senses guide you to relinquish the burning."

I did as he said, taking in deep breaths as well as listening for signs of animals nearby. I could hear the gushing of a lazy river northeast. It was accompanied by light crunches of grass along with the gentle lapping of a deer drinking water.

"I can hear a few heartbeats, up by the river. What do I do now?" I asked, desperate to quench the burning that had now become more apparent.

"Let your instincts take over," he advised.

I nodded, waiting for my body to take on the task of hunting the prey. I wasn't disappointed, my feet quickly took off of their own accord. As I ran, my eyes zoned in on the area the deer were drinking from. There were two fairly large does, but I was more focused on the large buck grazing behind them. Just the thought of drinking from him made my throat blaze.

As quickly as I had taken off, I stopped. Closing my eyes, I took another deep breath. It was another animal, a significantly larger one. The poor creature was wandering alone a few yards away from the deer. I smiled and took off again, willing my legs to move faster than before.

I broke through the trees and came face-to-face with my prey. A grizzly bear. He roared at me and stood up on his hind legs as if to say, _bring it on._ I darted behind the bear and snapped his neck in one quick flick of my wrist. Even if it was just an animal, it felt wrong to drink from him until he had died. The other way involved much more suffering for the bear, and I wanted no part of it.

I pierced the grizzly's neck and drank greedily from him. The blood once coursing through the bear's veins quickly turned cold. As the blood stopped pumping, the flavor was turned from merely bland to just a cooling liquid. Although it wasn't pleasant, I didn't mind it. I had no qualms with flavor, just as long as it took away the burning in my throat.

I stood and looked at the bear. His lifeless face was stuck in a permanent snarl, making it a bit easier to demolish the guilt building. I dug a deep enough hole for the bear to rest in and gently rolled him into it. After patting down the remaining piles of dirt, I turned to look for Edward.

I was excited when I found that the burning had disappeared, yet the guilt from the bear still lingered. The emotion was short-lived as another scent attacked my senses-quickly igniting the dormant flame. It was a strong and compelling scent, but I felt no need to chase it. Something was holding me back, warning me that this wasn't the right prey to go after.

I turned away from the offending smell, not wanting to give in to the temptation. I took a few steps towards looking for Edward when I felt something hit me from the side. My arms were pinned to my sides and my knees were suppressed to the ground by someone's legs to keep me from thrashing.

I looked up and met Edward's eyes, surprise and anger flooding me as I stared at his blank expression. I would expect this from an animal or a stranger-although he still technically was one-but not him. He was one of the people I was supposed to trust.

"You're not even attempting to get away?" he asked in surprise. I huffed and shook my head, giving him a look that clearly displayed my confusion at his antics. "I'm sorry, I just thought you were going to attack that human. I was going to stop you but it seems as though you didn't need my help."

His breath fanned across my face as he spoke, drowning me in his intoxicating scent. I noticed that even though he spoke of his misunderstanding, he made no move to get up. I stared into his golden eyes, silently wondering how we always ended up in this position.

Edward broke away first, realization dawning on him that he still had me pinned to the ground. He hopped to his feet and offered his hand to pull me up. I hesitantly took it and gasped as tiny shocks burst forth from his mere touch.

He smirked and shot me a knowing look. "Shall we?" he asked. I nodded and took off after him as he ran back to his home. The return was a lot quicker than the departure, which gave me a new appreciation for this lifestyle.

We quickly ran through the forest, crossed the river, and arrived back at the extraordinary home. He opened the door for me and called for a family meeting. Everyone gathered around as he described my first hunting trip.

As I was listening, I felt a sudden nagging feeling like I was missing something. I concentrated on it, trying to find some sort of reason for it. The feeling grew more pronounced the more I focused.

Suddenly an abstract image exploded in my mind. There were people mumbling, but I couldn't decipher what they were saying. Even the faces were blurred, the only parts visible were their silhouettes and the colors they wore.

The more I concentrated on the image, the vision of sorts, the more pain I endured from my head. So I stopped, I allowed the image to vanish from my mind. The pain in my head disappeared instantly, offering a small ounce of relief.

I felt cold and empty without the image filling my mind, as though I had just thrown away a part of myself. I knew I would eventually encounter the vision again. Just the thought of of what it may be made my silent heart warm with joy.

Maybe it was more than just an image. Maybe it was a..memory. If I regained my memories, I could finally get the answers I so desperately needed. For the first time since I awoke to this new life, I felt secure.

**Such a long wait, I know. I apologize for how long it took for a simple update, but I hope it was worth it! So now she is getting somewhere with her past, what do you think she will dredge up? Thanks for reading! **

**~T21**


	15. Chapter 15

**Bella's POV**

Time passed slowly as I adjusted to fresh habits and a new way of life. Edward and I grew closer, but I wasn't ready for a relationship of any sort with him. Yet I couldn't fight the will to want to be around him, more so than anyone else in the home, his presence was always inviting and comfortable.

That's not to say that I didn't enjoy the company of the others as well. Emmett and I would often fight, since he was so trained on my newborn strength waning, and we would play all sorts of video games. I grew tired of beating him after a few rounds so he always made sure to have a fresh stock of other games. Even though he made it seem very innocent, I could see the glimmer of hope when he challenged me to a new one. He would grunt in distaste of the game after losing and would glare at me as if to say, "Why don't you just let me win for once?"

During the day, when Carlisle was at work and everyone else at school, Esme and I would partake in designing things. We had already enhanced the garden to the best of our abilities so our next project would be remodeling a cottage. She would sit and peruse the floor tiles, asking me every now and again what I thought of some that caught her eye. Although I wasn't into designing things, it was fun to assist in building something. Seeing the end result was always the most rewarding of the projects.

Since Jasper was very into history, sometimes we would go over the discussions he and his classmates had while in class. It was fascinating to see how much he knew about our past world, it was one thing I never really understood why we needed to learn. In philosophical terms, we are supposed to forget our past and focus on the future. By studying history, it has created a great contradiction to the whimsical words of others. Although I wasn't very into it as much as he was, I loved seeing his eyes light up as he spoke of the horrors of the Civil War.

Alice and I spoke very little. She would loom in doorways and watch as I spent time with the others. Each time I would catch her eye, she would turn and walk away with a guilty expression darkening her face. I wanted to confront her about it, but I was afraid it had something to do with my past and I didn't want to hold any anger towards her. Especially over something I couldn't remember myself. I would instigate conversations with her, ones she willingly took part in, but she never approached me. Part of me didn't want to get to know her. She was very girly and I could only imagine what she would force me to do in a mall. Yet the other part, the more dominant part, wanted to get to know her and see what she was like when she wasn't being allusive.

Rosalie, on the other hand, was a completely different matter. Sometimes when we hunted together, a look would cross her face. One of sympathy. I didn't understand it and I never questioned her about it. Besides that, she avoided me like the plague. If I sat on the same couch as her, she would glare holes into the side of my head until I couldn't take it anymore. I would get up and run, the exhilaration masking the hurt building inside. It was as if we were in a nuclear power plant and I had skull and cross bones etched into my skin.

The slam of a door pulled me from my thoughts. I looked up to see Rosalie storm in as Edward quickly followed behind her. Alice swooped in behind him, grasping his arm and whispering words of assurance in his ear. His nostrils flared and his eyes crackled into a dark charcoal hue. I sat up and slowly approached them.

"What's going on?" I asked. Edward's gaze turned to me, flecks of gold seeping back in to the black. Alice freed his arm as he ghosted over to where I stood. His hands smoothed down my arms as he stared at me, his grasp was tight as though he was afraid I would run away from him.

"Rosalie did something very childish and stupid," Edward growled. I could hear her upstairs shoving things around and muttering obscenities about Edward and how he was overreacting. To what, I had no idea. I did know that I was certainly going to find out.

"Talk to me. What did she do?" I begged. His eyes found mine again, softening slightly. His jaw was clenched, the skin covering the muscle bounced slightly as he ground his teeth. I couldn't help the slither of warmth that ran up my spine seeing him so aggravated. It was kind of.. sexy.

"She ran into a werewolf. You remember what those are right?" he asked. I hesitantly nodded. "Well she told one of them, Jacob, that you were changed into a vampire."

The breath flew from my lungs. _Jacob_. The name was so familiar, I could feel it pulling in my mind. My mind worked in overdrive as I struggled to attach the name to a memory. An image shot across my brain, causing me to lose my footing. I tumbled down as the walls between my human memories and my vampire ones vanished.

I could faintly hear Edward calling my name but I tuned him out. If I couldn't get answers from him then I wouldn't pass on the chance of grasping them from my own mind. The Cullen home disappeared and I was transferred to a different scene.

I stood at the end of a short, narrow driveway. An ancient red Chevy was parked beside me, the keys to it clasped tightly in my slightly pale hands. The breath caught in my lungs. I was a human. I looked up and saw a man on the sidewalk. He had long hair that fell past his broad shoulders. Russet colored skin flared out across his face and underneath where the sleeves of his shirt ended. Light colored jeans and a plain, black t-shirt with dark boots to match concluded his outfit. _Jacob,_ my mind whispered.

He stood behind a man in a wheel chair, wearing similar clothing except his shirt was plaid. The same skin tone, although with noticeably more wrinkles, as well as the same hair. Their piercing brown eyes bore into mine. Before I could register what was happening, the scene changed.

Jacob and I were perched on a piece of driftwood lying close to the beach. The wind dusted off our hair from our shoulders, making it dance to a soundless tune. I could see his lips moving as he stared intently at me, but the words spewing from his mouth were silent. I focused harder, squeezing my eyes shut tightly as I struggled to hear what he was saying.

Finally, I could hear him. The more I concentrated, the louder he seemed to be. Like a radio dial only it required more work then simply flexing your fingers. Jacob told of a story that seemed to be only a myth in his mind. A story about vampires and how the culture he came from were tied to them. Enemies from the start. He chuckled and exaggerated at parts, wanting to give the true symptoms associated with good horror stories.

I felt a shake on my shoulder. I waved it off, listening eagerly as Jacob discussed his family history of the pack. A light flutter caressed my cheek along with a different voice whispering my name. I opened my eyes as Jacob's voice began to give way. His image before me slowly faded, distorting like rinsed soap from a window. I tried to scream or shout, desperate for him to come back, but it was of no use. He was gone. With a sharp intake of breath, I was back in the Cullen home.

Carlisle and Edward hovered above me, their faces masked with concern. Esme loomed behind them, shifting her weight uneasily as she waited for feedback. Emmett and Jasper were gone, leaving their mates alone to flank Esme. I turned my head to Edward, his gaze lightening with relief.

"Where's Jacob?" I demanded. Rosalie snorted, quickly masking it with a cough when Edward turned to glare at her. I sat up, a slight ache pulsed in my head from the fall. Ignoring it, I waited impatiently for someone to volunteer any information about Jacob.

"He's outside," Carlisle answered without hesitation. Edward groaned in annoyance and took a deep breath.

"How are you feeling?" Esme questioned.

"Fine," I quipped. "Can I go see him?"

"Absolutely not," Edward growled. Carlisle shot him a reprimanding look but didn't say anything. I stared at him with an astonished glare, anger boiling inside of me. How dare he try and prevent me from seeing a friend. He was merely a stranger, he had no control over me or any decisions I make. I jumped to my feet and headed towards the door. My steps echoed through the hall along with the soft swishing of the fabric covering my body. Just as I opened the doorknob, a pale hand shot out and closed it.

"Who do you think you are?" I yelled, exasperatedly. I stared at the door, too angry to turn around and offer Edward the chance to unravel my resolve with a simple look. Edward asked his family to leave and keep an eye on Jacob. I snorted in disgust, the temptation to just swing the door in his face overbearing.

Before I could offer a sarcastic remark, Edward had me turned around and pinned to the door. I gasped at his proximity, my anger dissolving quicker than sugar in hot tea. His face was mere inches from mine and only added to the fire sizzling between us. I knew something was happening with us, I was just too stubborn to admit it. Now, with his body molded to mine and his lips grazing mine, I could no longer deny my feelings for him.

When his lips met mine, the familiar tingle sparked a memory in my mind. I ignored the temptation to fall victim to the cage of my memories. For now, being aware that this has happened before was enough. I wasn't sure what happened to us the last time, but I wasn't about to ruin the moment by finding out. As I wrapped my arms around him, I silently promised myself that I would figure out what happened and fix it.

Yelling erupted from outside, evoking a growl from Edward. His lips left mine, causing a whimper of dismay to burst from my mouth. Edward smiled, like a promise that this was far from over. His fingers brushed my hair away from my shoulder and his lips left a lingering kiss on my neck. When the warmth of his body left mine, I tried to take a step forward. My legs turned into jelly and I felt the floor move closer to my face. Strong arms gripped my waist, sheltering me from the impact of the glossy wood.

"What am I going to do with you?" Edward chuckled. Before I could answer him, another outburst seeped in from outside. I blew out a breath and looked Edward in the eye.

"You're going to let me talk to Jacob."

**Once again I apologize for the delayed update. On the positive side of things, summer is quickly arriving so there will be more time for writing. So what do y'all think? She's finally opening herself up to Edward, but she's also regaining her memories. A pretty deadly combination. Please R&R! Thanks!**


End file.
